Thursday, November 4, 2010

my heart is broken

thanks to the really crazy weather lately, micah is currently asthma boy. he had a barking cough the other night which had me in tears. today he went to the doctor since he is very congested and has a fever on and off. he is breathing so rapidly, and his heart is beating so fast from all the albuterol.

this is our second day together, home from work and school. micah and i adore each other, but now that he has to take a lot of meds plus do treatment, we've gotten a little frustrated with each other. i know he doesn't feel well and it's not fun when someone is forcing icky tasting medicine in your mouth. even if i'm explaining why he needs to take it, that doesn't stop him from hiding from me. he doesn't understand how it hurts me to see him like this. or why i get upset when he makes himself throw up the medicine. i just want him to get better already.

but even when he's crying because he feels yucky or he's cranky, he still manages to be polite and sweet. he says thank you when i give him something to eat or drink. he also said sorry for throwing up the medicine. before he went to sleep tonight he told me, "i think my heart is broken, maybe i can find something to fix it." i told him that he had a big heart and it was just fine. he smiled and hugged me. it's my heart that's broken right now. please get better little boy.